KF2 Trader Time Etiquette: A Japanese Joke Guide

Trader time is usually seen as shopping time between waves, but this Japanese community guide argues that veteran players use it for something far more refined. It is a deadpan parody, and the last line admits that everything in it is a joke. It is a fun look at how players behave between waves, and a reminder to keep that time friendly.

The basics

Shopping should be done fast: head to the trader near the end of the wave with your purchases already decided, and finish within about four seconds. After that, the "real game" starts, which consists of:

• An emote showcase
• The knife dance
• A written wave review
• RJHE

Emote showcase

Emotes supposedly raise team morale. Show every emote you have, even the free default ones, which the author jokingly calls bold and simple, a sign of a veteran. Do it toward the whole team, and when a teammate emotes at you, reply in kind (the guide calls this Personal Emote Communication). Do not repeat the same emote over and over; the joke limit is at most 24 per trader time. If you get kicked for emoting, switch to another emote.

Knife dance

The basic form of trader-time dance: equip the knife and alternate light and heavy attacks. Customize it by:

• Switch interval: fast is passionate, slow is calm and adult.
• Additional accents: add crouching up and down at a steady pace for rhythm, or reload motions, side-to-side movement and big camera spins.

Do it toward the team, or invite a teammate to dance once you are on good terms.

Wave review essay

Feedback after each wave helps the team. List as many bad points as good ones, ask questions about plays, and do not be discouraged if nobody replies since others are busy dancing. Write in a language others may share: the joke is that English only works for the English, Russian for Russians, and that Tamil is a safe backup because 90 percent of KF2 players are Tamil. A review should run 1,200 to 2,000 characters.

RJHE

Ridiculous Jumping High-tension Expression: spam the space bar to jump wildly. Considered tasteless compared to the knife dance, but it is the most direct way to show excitement after a very cool moment. If someone types RJHE in chat, the whole team is expected to join in.

Advanced "pranks"

The guide mentions a welding prank (pretending to be a newbie welding pointless doors, ideally until the last moment of the break) and a weapon theft prank (picking up dropped weapons while sincerely thanking their owner over radio). It warns these may get you kicked and are only for servers where everyone is in on it. In a real match, do not take other players' weapons or block doors without consent.

Closing

"Everything written here is a joke. The end."

See also KF2 emotes.